WHEN YOU ARE YOUR VILLAGE!!!!

Have you ever wondered how your neighbour defines that word "village"??? Growing up as a kid,I was made to understand that the village is where evil things happen,where destinies are stolen and where great futures are shattered. Unfortunately, I have come of age and I can tell you that I have never been to my village since I was born!!! You can choose to exclaim,but that's true because of the impression our fore father's gave us.

Looking at the present day,we discover that when people fail in life,academics,business and every other aspect,they always most at times trace it to their village. You hear stuffs like " This thing is from my village" or " Them dey do am from village". These beliefs are not all true.

I do not deny and dispute the fact that there are people in villages who mean bad for certain people but I've come to realize that 90% of those who think the problem is from their village are totally wrong!!! So I began to ask myself, what if YOU ARE YOUR VILLAGE?? What if after blaming all the grannies in your hometown,you discover that the real problem facing you is not the village itself but the village in you?? I'll leave you to answer that....

A man's greatest enemy is himself!!! Some people know the right things to do,yet they don't do it. You know you have to read to pass,yet you wait till the last day of revision. You know you have to build yourself in the line of business, yet you wait till the opportunity comes and slips off your hands... You are so nonchalant and relaxed about everything, yet you dream of using the best car. Listen, Assumption is the lowest form of knowledge so you have to rise to your feet and leave that village in YOU!! Yes!!! I said Leave that village in You!!!

When you sleep at the time you ought to work, eat at the time you ought not too, talk at the time you ought to be quiet or play at the time you ought to be serious, you are activating the village in you!!! There is a village inside of you that do not want you to make progress... Do you know the name of that village??? FEELINGS!!!..

Your FEELINGS are selfish and egocentric... It is feelings that will tell you that you are tired,so go to bed. The same feelings will tell you why not go to that party and do your assignment tomorrow!! The same feelings will tell you to procrastinate because there is still time. SELFISH!! It only wants you to please it and when you continue to please it,you have raised up the failure ancestors in you that have been long dead and you discover that you are 40 years old and yet there is no achievement. Then you start pointing fingers to your hometown!!!

Can't you see that you are your problem?? Can't you see that you are your village?? The earlier you see,the better!! I am writing this article so that we as youths and upcoming individuals will understand that our lives are not tied to one god in the village!!! When the Almighty God created us,He gave us the Power to get wealth. But most of us kill this Power by indiscipline, unseriosness, Laxity,Love of feelings...etc...

Cmon guys.we ain't getting any younger. Can't you see that you will become 30 very soon ?? Remember, a man's youth is a gift from God!!! So we rise together as a force to suppress our feelings,reaccess our aims and address our goals!!! Let's not allow the village in us take us to the least places of life. Always know that your attitude towards success is a 100% determinant of your success!!!

NO MORE VILLAGE BELIEFS!!! OUR FUTURE LIES IN OUR MINDS AND HANDS!!!

See you at the top!!!!

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 9!!!

“Hi”
“Hello” I replied
That was Jide’s sister I guess. . . It was kinda weird, I mean this
type of date. Jide didn’t tell me we were going for lunch at his
parents. Too sudden I guess. . . It’s just date 2 after a six months
reunion. Maybe he was overwhelmed in the excitement and he is
trying to taking things a little bit up notch or he is trying to impress
me. Whichever way, I am here already and it’s too late to turn
back but I am definitely gonna make sure to tell him not to pull
that kind of surprise on me again. I’m not used to it. I can only
pray the lunch goes well.
“This is Sade Jones, my sister. Our last born. She is in the University
studying Food Technology. In her second year actually.”
“Hi. It’s my pleasure to meet you.” I replied, facing the sister and
exchanging handshake with her. What lady does handshake? Except
me! Handshake is typical guys.
“And this is my brother, Femi Jones, he’s the 3rd born, after me.
He is in his finals at the University, studying Chemical Engineering.”
“And finally, this is my big sister, she’s the first born of the house,
I came after her. She’s married and she came around to spend some
days with Mum and Dad with her husband. She graduated four
years ago with B. A. Mass Communication and she’s an ace
broadcaster. Her name is Kayinsola and this is her husband, Uncle
Funso.” He said pointing facing their side.
“And their little baby Folakemi.”
“Good evening ma, it’s a pleasure to meet all of you.”
“It’s our pleasure to meet you too.” They said in chorus. It’s like
they’ve rehearsed it but yet I was still a little bit uncomfortable. I
am yet to meet the real goons of the house; Mr. and Mrs. Jones.
Finally, the table was set and we were all seated to eat when Mrs.
Jones walked in and I greeted her warmly and she gave me a warm
embrace not knowing who I am yet. Maybe it never mattered for
now because I was with her son and she knows definitely the
introduction is going to come. With everybody seated except Mr.
Jones, but not for long as he walked in a top and short. His face
looked familiar. Can’t remember where but I hope it’s not where I
am thinking it is and I hope it’s just an assumption and that
hopefully none of us has ever seen each other before. He sat down
and was calm but I greeted him and he greeted me too.
Jide blessed the meal and he told his family he wanted to say
something.
“Before we eat, I would want to introduce someone who all my
siblings have met except you Mum and Dad.”
“She is. . .”
“She is nobody!” Jide’s dad screamed.
Everyone was surprised and now it looks like my world was gonna
crash.
“Dad!”
“Son!” He screamed back at Jide.
“This is no girlfriend of yours.”
“She isn’t my girlfriend yet dad but I was gonna ask her to be my
girlfriend today hoping she wasn’t gonna turn me down again.”
I really wished Jide hasn’t said that, that wasn’t necessary or
maybe it was my feelings that was hurt.
“Well son, this is no soon-to-be-girlfriend of yours!”
“What’s going on here?” Jide’s elder sister, Kayinsola asked, facing
her dad.
“Hey young lady, stand up, on your feet.” Chief Jones screamed at
me.
I couldn’t stand up, my feet were cold, it was obvious we had met
in the course of my rendezvous but I can’t remember having
anything to do with him.
“Do you remember me? Allen Venue, late last year, around 10pm?”
I was speechless still.
“You see son! This girl is a hooker! A prostitute. She sleeps with men
for money and the sexual enjoyment.” He said facing Jide.
“And how do you know all of that Dad? 10pm? Allen Avenue?
What were you doing there?” He said with his voice becoming violent
towards his dad.
“I won’t have you question me in my own home or create
unnecessary fuss over this prostitute here. This lunch is over.”
“Shall we?” Jide’s voice beckoned on me to stand up.
I left without a word. I was broken. Jide never said a word
throughout the drive home. Even when he dropped me at home, he
never uttered a word or open the door of the car for me as he
used to. I sat for an hour in front of the house speechless, sad and
hurt.
The whole compound was extremely silent. It was becoming late, to
7pm. I decided to open my door. I came in, on the light to an huge
display of fresh blood all over the rug, smelling so fresh. I was
scared. No one was around. Not even one neighbour. Has someone
broken in? And by the way where’s Amaka? She was supposed to
be at home. What has happened to her?
I dialed Amaka’s line countless times, it wasn’t reachable. There’s a
huge cause for alarm. Where’s Amaka? Who would I call now?
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THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 8!!!

It rang 6.00a.m. sharp. . . Nothing’s constant like the precision of
my alarm clock waking me up when it needed to. Rising from the
bed isn’t one of my favourite to do list events but staying too long
on the bed could make me sick. . . Right! But staying on the bed all
day long is Amaka’s most hideous hobby. She calls it ‘beauty rest’!
lmao! How I wish that was really true; lazy Igbo girl!
The whole compound was silent except for the glorious sounds coming
from Mama Seun and her husband’s quarters and that could only be
one thing. Well, I am impressed Mama Seun could make him sound
that way but I guess I make him yell!
“Really, early morning sexual fantasies?”
It was as if I was Riggan and there was a birdman voice but the
difference was that I wasn’t tormented but bullied by a voice not
an inch closer to Birdman’s but very much similar to Amaka’s.
“What?” I said facing her.
“Water. . . You make him yell!” she said spoiling her whole face.
“Never knew I said that out!”
“Well you did!”
“And I thought you were sleeping. . .”
“And I was until you started becoming weird. . .” she fired back
with her big eyeballs rolling.
“I wasn’t fantasizing, I was just. . .”
“Devil, I bind you. Commot here abeg! Shoo!”
. . . And she literally shut me up.
“Well, I am not going.”
“Well, you will!”
I could see her aiming for under the pillow, whatever she was
gonna bring, I don’t want to wait to see it, I dashed out with my
phone in hand, jamming the door behind me. I could hear her
hysterical laugh.
“I’m glad you fear me babe cos I wasn’t going to bring out
anything under that pillow except for my hair net which I forgot to
put on last night.”
“Go to hell!” I opened the door slightly and screamed back at her.
“I love you too!” she replied.
I hit the showers and that’s the only thing I love about the house
apart from the kitchen. It has a ridiculous structuring; a self-
contain where me and Amaka stays, more or less like a one-bedroom
flat, it has a boys-quarters with five rooms at the back where
Mama Seun, her husband and two kids shared a room, Mama Titi
and her friend’s husband, literally, now her husband stays in
another, Papa Chinyere, Mama Chinyere and Chinyere in one, Okon,
Amaka’s unexplored virgin friend who I’m sure Amaka would end up
deflowering one day stays in another and finally, Eliza who I think
might be experiencing sexual abuse from his father with all those
breasts dangling around stays in another with him. . . What a house
setting I must say!
I laid in the Jacuzzi, soaked myself in bubble baths with my
strawberry shower gel and my headset tightly held to my head, I hit
the play button with Omawumi’s “Love Wantintin” blasting through
my ear drums and it felt like heaven. Listening to her makes me soul
come alive. She has this voice indescribable, I call it a designer-voice!
If you hear Megbele, you’d know it’s her!
I was in this position enjoying the cool massage coming from the
bath and shuffling songs between Omawumi’s “Stay Alive”, “In the
Music”, “Niger Delta 1” and “Megbele” for like 45 minutes. . .
Maximally satisfied, I ran a cold bath; I love a cold bath after a
long-stretch of warmness. I made for the room, Amaka was very
much sleeping, she doesn’t pretend but a little side talk or comment
wakes her up, she comments and trips off again.
I massaged my body gently with my luscious body lotion. It’s my
most expensive beauty routine item after my clothes and heels. I
slipped into a jean trouser, a crop top, tied my hair in buns and I
made for the sitting room. It was already fifteen minutes past 7. I
plugged in my phone to the speaker and I was blasting Mocheedah’s
“Destinambari” featuring the king of Alobam, Phyno with all other
songs waiting in line after it. I made for the kitchen which was
only separated from the sitting room by some fine carvings of wood
work in a cute and sexy way.
One thing was sure, I was hyper-active this morning but guess this
was the good type. The only craving I had was scrambled egg, bread
and coffee. I set to it with my Beyonce shaking to every blasting
song. In less than five minutes, my scrambled egg was ready and in
another two minutes, my coffee was ready and I never forgot to
plan for the devil’s meal with mine. . . Making the necessary
cleanings, Kesha’s “First Kiss” was blasting and I couldn’t resist the
sweetness but had to switch on my dancing skills. . . That song makes
me feel seventeen again.
“Shoo! Na dance be that? What are you even good at sef? Sexual
fantasies and scrambled eggs cos that definitely smells nice.”
“Speaking of the devil some few minutes ago, I never knew she
would be up so soon.” I fired back at her making my way to sit
with my portion of the breakfast.
“Na me be devil o! but I won’t forget. Big sisters let things slide. . .
Anyways, the dance wasn’t that bad. You tried.”
“Thanks. . . What’s up with waking up early?” I turned to face her
only to discover she was off to the kitchen.
“Have you forgotten I have an appointment today? The event
planning proposal I have to deliver. You know I am not the only one
hoping to be awarded the contract.”
“So what time is your presentation?”
“10am and thereafter I am coming back home to sleep my head off.
It’s just an hour presentation or even less than. ”
“You eating without brushing? No wonder your teeth is off-white.” I
said going to the kitchen to drop my empty plate and cup.
“You know I tried to be so intimidated but I couldn’t be. You know
why? Cos you don’t need a filter for these teeth. It’s whiter than
your white pant!” she said, opening wide her canine and molars. This
girl is so disgusting, chai!
“And by the way, scrambled eggs and coffee is like kissing to me.
You don’t remember brushing your teeth when you wake up in the
morning say 4-5am and you slam your partner some crazy sloppy
kisses. You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I do. The bathroom is waiting for you. Countdown to 10am.”
I replied her.
“Lest I forget, your coffee sucks, you need to learn from the best,
and I am the best, queen of coffee.
“Well, I am glad that sucked coffee fed your belly this morning and
remember to tell your future husband when you feed him coffee as
breakfast, lunch and dinner that you are the queen of coffee!”
“I need not do that, you can do that when you meet him for me.
Crazy ass!” she said hitting me throwing splashes of water from the
sink at me as she went off to the bathroom.
“Wow! Looks like someone treated herself to a wonderful bubble
bath. . . and all those love songs you playing. . .”
“That was mere coincidence.” I fired back.
“Definitely!”
Then she stopped talking and all I could hear was splashes of
running water. In less than five minutes, Amaka was out; the
fastest ‘bather’ I ever know. The highest she ever spends in the
bathroom is 5minutes 60seconds and that’s approximately six minutes.
Then she came out all dress in a white no-sleeved jumpsuit with her
7 inches braids all in black tied in a bun, makeup and brows on fleek
and her feet perfectly rocking a 3 inches blue heels and a neutral
coloured purse, Amaka rocks into the sitting room like a queen. It
wasn’t only the makeup and brows that was on fleek, the jumpsuit
put the nicki minaj behind her on fleek.
“Awwww! You gorgeous darling.” I said.
“I know that.”
“You are a fool, you can just say thanks and stop feeling yourself.”
“You know I meant thank you and by the way, your Beyonce is
beginning to compete with my Nicki these days, are you taking
something for those kids?”
“You’re crazy!”
“So, what’s the deal with you and Jide again? You’ve always liked
the guy since the days of cray-cray at the restaurant but you’ve
also always turned the guy down. . . And now he’s back, one date. . .
What’s the deal?” She asked sitting beside me on the sofa, facing
me like she wants to lie-detect me.
“I don’t know what you are talking about.” I said slightly smiling
and trying to avoid her eyes.
“Okay. . . what me I sha know is that, what you are feeling for this
guy is Ebola! No cure for am! Is either you date him, that’s if he
still wants to or stop wasting each others time but take it is easy
though.” She said like a young mother advising her teenage daughter.
“Craze dey worry you. I swear.”
“Anyways, we would talk more about this when I get back but you
have my full support in whatever your heart requires and cook
something before I get back.” She stood to leave.
“Well, I have a date for 4pm and I might not be at home not to
talk of cooking for you.”
“Date 2? Well, that’s good. Make sure you have fun only if you
remember to bring another KFC.”
“No be only KFC, na CFK!. . . But it’s not yet 10!”

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 7!!!

Going out with Jide was exactly my getaway. I needed the cool
aura, the solemn oldies and the delicious sauced fried snails of the
restaurant. . . Jide is indeed a man of class and I enjoyed every
meal from the dessert to the main course and to every music played
that I couldn’t but store the name of the restaurant in my petite
medulla oblongata. . . Can’t even remember the last time I went on
a date or treated myself purposelessly to a great meal but it
definitely would be two weeks today that I had my last ‘sexcapade’.
. . well, they are both nourishing to the body, it depends on which is
prioritized. In short, I had an obvious fun that has shifted my
attention more to the food aspect.
Finally, Jide pulled a stop in front of my humble No. 5 home. We
were both silent throughout the ride except for the part where he
made a stop at KFC. A part of me was really tired that all I
wanted to do was run a hot bath and sleep but the other part was
willing to excitedly respond to Amaka’s impending ‘gist me’ long-
throat and the ‘what did you do when he did this?’ ‘what’s the
unexpected that happened?’ ‘Did you guys kiss?’ and I’d so vomit in
her face, God help me.
“I’m so glad you could squeeze out a time. I had a great time.” He
said, finally breaking the silence.
“Well, I had a nice time too. Thanks for the dinner and the ride.”
“Anytime dear. . . And I must say you looked so delectable tonight.”
I thought he never noticed and would never compliment me! God help
am, I thought to myself but seriously I be fool o!
“Thanks. You look great too.”
Then he got down, came over to my side and opened the door, ‘how
gentlemanly’ and Amaka’s voice was screaming in my head ‘Don’t be
deceived’ lol. . . the girl no dey ever trust guys like I was even
better but she’s definitely the worst except if she really likes the
guy but she hardly does.
“Thanks.” I said finally stepping down from the cool breeze of the
AC.
“My pleasure.”
“Let me walk you to the door and use that opportunity to say hi to
Amaka that’s if she’s around.”
“She should be.”
“And this is for Amaka.”
He handed me a takeaway pack and I could smell it without opening
it and it was humming KFC.
“Ok. Thanks.”
I wanted to say he shouldn’t really have bothered but I have learnt
overtime not to tell a guy ‘he shouldn’t have’ after he already did.
The truth is I’m glad he did but in the bid to be courteous and all,
we end up saying ‘you really shouldn’t have bothered’ when the
bother dey sweet my belle as hell. A simple and sincere thank you
says it all.
He slipped his palms into mine; I made a light and silent chuckle. It
kinda felt good; mine was cold, his was warm.
“Una weldone o! You go out? Welcome”
Really, this woman will not kill me. Jide sef couldn’t hide his
amusement. . . Mama Seun and her uncensored gbeboruns. . . I don’t
even know what she was doing there. Most times, I tend to find
her annoying and another time, hilarious . . . plus all the neighbours
join together but guess that’s what you get when you live in a
house with a funny plan as No. 5 and your friend refuses to answer
the door bell. . . Abi Amaka don get company?
Before I could even look sideways to reply Mama Seun, she don
vamoose and Amaka had finally opened the door. I gave her a sharp
look that speaks “wa a fe ku lale yi” in Reminisce’s voice making
sure she got the look.
“Hey!”
“Hello” Jide said, replying Amaka.
“You weren’t around when I came to pick her. . .”
“Yeah right. I took a walk. . . Six months and it’s already been like a
year. . . Good to see you again! You guys should come in na!”
“Hmmmm. I am definitely about to say the same. It’s highly great
seeing you again too Amaka. . . Hope she hasn’t been much of a
trouble?”
“Not too much trouble beyond my grasp. . .”
“You are not well. . .” I fired back at Amaka.
“I would like to take my leave from here. . .” Jide said.
“Alright then. . . Thanks for stopping by and thanks for the KFC
too!” Amaka replied.
“And who told you it was yours?” I snapped.
“And whose would it be if not mine. Wetin I sha know be say, no
be you buy am come house for me.”
“And who says I would buy something and bring home for you?” I
said rolling my eyes with Jide enjoying our mini soap opera.
“Exactly my point! You can’t and you didn’t!”
“Whatever! Take, chop am and add am to your nicki ass!” I hit her
with it on the chest.
“No hard feelings bae, would gladly.”
“You girls are hilarious. . .
“Girls? Hello o! We grown ass women! We are ladies.” Amaka cuts in.
“Pardon my slip of tongue. . . would love to be on my way now
ladies.”
“Well-said! Thanks for coming by. Goodnight.” Amaka said, dashing off
into the room, jamming the door loudly.
The girl is a fool, I don’t know what game she’s trying to play
leaving us two outside. I stood by the door balancing on the ground
with my 3 inch Alexander McQueen heels that makes me a 6 ft 5”,
a crop top and a jean. I love my body; there’s no other way I love
to admire myself than when standing.
“Take care. Would call you tomorrow. . . Good night.”
“Good night Jide!”
I watched him enter his car, reverse and drive off till I couldn’t
see his car again and I guess that meant something; something
that’s not healthy for me!

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 6

One would have thought Amaka had it for Jide and vice versa but
reverse was the case. . . Amaka never hit on guys but she never
fails to appreciate the aesthetic works of God on a guy whenever
she sees one. Sometimes when I’m alone, I realize how much she
means to me; she’s the sister I never had.
Sitting side by side with Jide never felt so real until I remembered
how it started and what it used to be back then. . . Something in
me wasn’t convenient with the fact that Jide and Sola’s girlfriend
knew about the whole molestation story. I do appreciate my private
life and not only normal people get molested, hookers are molested
too, I’m not admitting to anything *donno what you think I am*
but I do appreciate privacy a lot.
“Who cares for privacy? Girl, you dey dull me o. Seriously, what has
happened to you?”
“I’m pregnant” I blurted out
“I’m glad but who is the father and don’t tell me it’s Sola cos na
molestation you call am no be rape!”
Amaka is a fool! I can see all the gestures in her eyes and I know
she’s up to no good.
“Abeg free me Amaka; there is nothing going on. I’m just having
some terrible flashes of things I have seem to forgotten; that’s all
and I am not pregnant cos I can already see your brain is
calculating again.”
“Well, I would have to see a concrete proof that you are not
harboring a bastard in there. All you need is a small bottle and we
have a lot of unused, yet to expire PT kits in here, so just don’t
flush down that early morning water tomorrow, get me my copy!”
“Walahi you be fool!” I said throwing her a pillow.
“Bae, you’d be fine, get over yourself please, don’t allow a simple
almost fatal experience tear your walls down, it’s not worth it!”
She threw her arms round me, wrapping me tightly. Amaka is really
my soothing massage chair, no homo and we are straight as hell.
She’s a good girlfriend and sister. . . she held me tightly for like
thirty minutes whispering soothing words in my ears, some crazy
words I hit her for and some a slap. I was relieved and we were
laughing our hearts out until we had a loud bang at the door. . .
“You go get the door, I’m off to the bathroom!” she said to me.
“Why you dey always bath like mammy water pikin like this?”
“I sweated after a very engaging fight I launched on your behalf!
Hello o” she said with her eyes almost bulging out.
“I send you message? Mumu girl” I said as she already left for the
bathroom.
“You welcome! And by the way, I was kidding about having a copy
of your urine, I believe you sweetie” she echoed from the bathroom!
Stupid girl! Like I was gonna give her a copy before? A copy? Is
my urine a document? This girl na proper were I tell you; full of
misappropriated and twisted dictions.
“Who’s there?”
“It’s me ma.”
“You, who?” I enquired further.
“Eliza!”
I quickly opened the door. Somehow, I feel responsible for the girl.
Somehow, I have this connection with her even though I hate her
guts and her uncontrolled blabbing.
“Come in” I said, opening the door for her to enter.
“Thank you.”
She looked so decent and was properly talking to me for the first
time that it felt so unreal except for the fact that her breast
packs were missing as usual.
“Wetin happen Eliza?”
“Errrm! Errm! I am so sorry for the other time.”
“It’s fine really.” . . . Was it? Lol.
“Thank you o.” she said almost kneeling down.
“Abeg, aunty Amaka dey aus too? I go like make both of una dey
together so I fit talk wetin I wan talk”
“Ow! Okay.” Now this is getting weird believe me.
“Amaka! Amaka o!”
“Yes, you called.”
She was standing right in front of me like some Nollywood
disappearing and appearing powers had brought her.
“You finished early.” I said murmuring hoping she didn’t hear that.
“Well, I heard you. Thanks! Life is not static; we change, so I
changed for the moment. . . And who do we have here?” she said
eyeballing Eliza.
Amaka never liked Eliza, she despises her eagerness and early signs
of promiscuity. Mama na prophet. The day she called to tell me Eliza
was showing early signs of promiscuity, I laughed my ass out! Gosh!
“Aunty Amaka, good afternoon ma.”
“Afternoon o!”
I can’t help but laugh. “So what can we do for you o Eliza”
“Abeg, I need your financial help. I need to pay my school fee and
to register for some O’Level exams like NECO and WAEC GCE. I’ve
searched round the compound finding who I can seek help from but
you are the only people that crossed my mind.
“Please, help me.” she said kneeling down.
She was actually being overdramatic I think.
“Well that is a small thing, I can spare some contacts.”
“Amaka!” I gave her a very sharp look that screams ‘What was
that about’
“Okay, Eliza, we don’t have much but we would help you. First, let’s
start with your school fee; that’s the most pressing one.
How much is the school fee?” Amaka asked.
“6,000 naira ma.”
“Okay, come back around 9pm. We would have something for you.”
“Thank you so much. God go bless you o.” she said taking her leave.
“And Eliza, why don’t you wear clothes for your. . .” I said pointing
to her chest area.
“The only one wey I get don tear and papa no gimme money to get
wetin I need.”
“Okay, what’s your size?”
She looked down without saying anything. I guess that meant she
had no idea and was a little embarrassed.
“Okay, wait for me here.”
Amaka was just standing, staring at us. I went in and I came out
with some of the new ones I got. They are expensive though.
“This should size you I guess.” I handed it over to her.
“God bless you o!” she left.
“Amaka! What was that about? You have contacts to spare?”
“Yes na. She needed help and since she had been grooming herself
for so long, I wanted to give her an expensive opportunity to make
for herself more than she needed. We never needed the money but
she does.”
“Amaka! Let’s us just forget about this for now!”
“I get what you are trying to do, you feel responsible for her, you
trying to redeem your soul by helping her, fine! If it works for you,
you have my full support.”
“Okay. But don’t forget we are helping her. At least, let’s give her
10k, she pays for her school fees and use the remaining 4k for
food or something.
“Alright.” She left!
“We are helping her o Amaka!” I screamed
“And you are responsible for her!” She screamed back from the
room.
Yea! That’s the part of Amaka that gets nasty. . . My phone
vibrated and that’s a message and I really hope it isn’t Sola.
“hey, how are you feeling now and I guess you feel a lot
better. . .
Are you free for 7pm? If yes, I would like to book for that
time. Kindly
get back to me. My regards to Amaka. . . Jide.”
Didn’t know I was reading it out until I heard Amaka speak!
“My regards to him too!”
“And anyways he likes you” she said with a laughter in her voice.
I lifted my head and I saw her still there!
“Oh girl! Get your nicki minaj off my sight and go dress up!” I said to
her seeing her filling my face with her big ass.
“He likes you o, you know abi?”
“Amaka!”
“He likes you!” she said walking away and reversing like a car!
“Amaka, na wetin na?” I picked the remote to throw at her and
she zoomed off.
Stupid girl!. . . And that was how things started with Jide even
though we weren’t dating till he left for New York only to return
without a prior notice.

FORBIDDEN LOVE 7

Five days later, after school on Friday, uncle Sam came to pick me
and Esther up. I begged my parents earlier to let me spend the
night with Esther at uncle Sam’s since I wasn’t going to have the
opportunity to do that when I got to the hostel. Uncle Sam also
helped to beg and told my parents to let me, so that we could spend
time together since I wasn’t going be around for long. I packed I
and Esther’s clothes into a small suitcase and uncle Sam put it into
the trunk of his car. Before we drove off, my mum told uncle Sam
to bring us back before noon the next day so that we could finish
the school shopping and get ready to go to the hostel on Sunday.
“Yes ma! No problem!!! We will be back soon. Don’t miss us oo,” uncle
Sam replied my mum before starting the engine and driving off.
Esther who sat behind me while I was seated in front just kept
waving at my mum until she was out of sight and in no time, we
were at his place. I got down from the car, went directly to open
Esther’s door and was about to open the trunk of uncle Sam’s car
when he told me not to worry, that he would help us with it. He
said we were his guests and didn’t want to give us stress so he told
us not to do anything except to ask him what we wanted to eat or
do. We got inside and uncle Sam directed us to the room we would
be sleeping in. He told us to change and come out to watch the
television or eat whatever we wanted. He even mentioned ice cream
being in the freezer which made Esther jump happily.
“My refrigerator is all yours, in fact, my house is all yours,” He had
said laughing.
I went into the room he had assigned us with Esther and brought
out comfortable clothes for us to wear. Esther was putting on one
of her princess dresses like she always calls it so I got her to
change into something much better. I was putting on jeans and a
simple blouse so I just change the jeans into some comfortable shorts
instead. After we were done changing, we went into the sitting
room to join uncle Sam who had also changed into a shirt and shorts.
My sister immediately went to meet him and asked for the ice
cream he had mentioned earlier. Funny Esther, he stood up and they
both left for the kitchen. While they were dishing out their ice
cream, I was going through my phone to be sure I wasn’t missing a
call or message. There wasn’t a missed call or message so I dropped
my phone aside and looked around in search of the remote control to
the television. When I spotted it on the table, beside the couch
uncle Sam had been sitting on, I stood up to go get it when I heard
uncle Sam and Esther approaching from the kitchen. I looked up and
saw them with cups of ice cream in their hands.
Uncle Sam’s pov
After dishing out ice cream for Esther, she insisted I dished mine
and her sister’s as well. Esther the ever caring girl and so I did as
I was told and we left the kitchen with Esther smiling. When we
got to the sitting room, my eyes noticed Meso straight away who
also looked up the moment we approached the room. She looked as
beautiful as ever. I wanted to take her right there at that
moment but we weren’t alone, so I managed to behave. I gave her
the ice cream we had dished for her and we all sat down to enjoy
the moment. I noticed she had already changed the channel to one
of those shows she enjoyed watching but Esther who wanted to
watch something else started whining.
“I want to watch cartoon, Meso please..,” Esther said.
Meso who already guessed she was going to do that, shook her head
and sighed in annoyance before changing the channel to a cartoon
station. I couldn’t help myself but to stare at her every movement.
I only took my eyes off when I felt she noticed I was staring and
pretended to be busy with my phone. I was going crazy for her. I
just couldn’t understand why I hadn’t felt this way for a woman
before. It got to a point I even opened the camera app on my
phone and pointed it towards her direction in order for me to stare
at her beauty without anyone noticing. I zoomed the camera until I
could see every part of her body since she was sitting down on the
couch across where I sat. My eyes scanned from the gorgeous eyes
that sparkles in my mind to the fresh thighs that laid marvellously
on the couch. I just couldn’t understand why I couldn’t control
myself at that moment. I had to confess my love for her. I needed
to let her know so I would probably feel better. I needed to do
something. My heart was beating so fast and I didn’t feel
comfortable anymore.
Meso’s pov
I felt so restless since I wasn’t able to watch my show because of
Esther who wanted to watch her cartoon. Instead of looking
around, I decided to play games on my phone but I wasn’t feeling
comfortable because I felt like I was being watched by something
or someone so I looked up to uncle Sam who sat across me and saw
that he was busy with his phone. I guessed it was just an illusion so
I went back to my phone and not long after, uncle Sam spoke,
standing up;
“Meso, please can you come with me. I need you to help me with
something.”
“Okay uncle, I’m coming,” I said as I stood up and followed him.
He was going into his bedroom and so I followed behind. Esther who
didn’t seem to care or notice just kept on watching her cartoon.
When I got into his room, uncle Sam went to sit by the chair that
stood beside the table in his room while he gestured for me to sit on
his bed. I couldn’t understand why because he had said to follow
him so I could help him with something. I didn’t say anything, I just
did as I was told, waiting patiently for him to talk. I actually
thought he was going to give me one of those lectures about school.
The ones on facing your studies and being a good girl since that had
been the only talk ever since my family and relatives heard I was
going to become a boarder until I heard him say;
“Meso, I’m in love with you.”
I was still confused because I didn’t know where this was heading
to until he left the chair he was seated on and went on his knees
right in front of me.
“Meso, I love you with all my heart. I want to make love with you.
I want to you to be all mine. I want you in my arms. I can’t hold
it any longer.” He kept on saying, still leaving me in shock and
confusion.
Make love with you?…..all mine?….you in my arms?. It kept on
repeating in my mind because I was trying to understand the
meaning of what he was saying. “Uncle Sam, I don’t
understand you.” I remember saying to him.
“Let’s just do it now, just once and we keep it a secret,” he said,
taking his shirt off.
That was when I realized what uncle Sam had been trying to say.
He wanted to have sex with me. I stood up immediately trying to
step away from him but I wasn’t fast enough because he went
straight to the door and locked it, keeping the key to the door on a
high shelf that stood beside his closet. My heart was pounding as I
was trying to process everything. In my heart, I was hoping it was
a dream. I looked into my uncle’s eyes and I swear I was terrified
of him. I had never seen him with so much hunger in his eyes, so
desperate and so scary. I wished I had seen the devil instead. I
moved back when I realised he was coming towards me.
“Uncle Sam, please, please. Don’t hurt me. I beg you uncle Sam,” I
said while he was moving closer to me.
“Meso, I really don’t want to harm you. I just want you to love me
back. I promise you’ll enjoy it. Just give me a chance Meso, my love.
I love you with all my heart. I promise you’ll like it.”

Uncle Sam's Pov
I could see the fear in her eyes, I knew she was going to hate me
after this but I just couldn’t control myself. I needed her as much
as I needed the air I breathe. I wanted to be all over her. I
noticed the tear that dropped from her eyes as she started crying.

Meso's Pov
I cried and pleaded with uncle Sam but he wouldn’t listen. I ran to
the door and started banging on it, hoping Esther or some neighbours
would hear but I guess that made uncle Sam mad and so he dragged
me away from the door and threw me on the bed. Before I could
even move, he started placing kisses all over my body. He tried to
kiss me on the lips but I kept moving my face, trying to get away
from his grip but he was too strong. He held me down so tight and
manage to take off my clothes. I was left in my underwear and
him, in his boxers. I told myself I could still escape and kept
struggling but it was all a waste when he finally got what he
wanted. He took off the remaining clothing on me, leaving me naked
and raped me while still trying to place kisses all over my body
despite my cries and pleas. He had taken my virginity, my dignity I
had lost. I could only feel pain after he was done. He laid beside me,
panting like a dog until he sighed and stood up. Looking down at me,
he said;
“Meso, why you doing like this now? You’ll be acting like you didn’t
enjoy it. Oya go and clean up in the washroom. Let me change the
bedsheet because there’s blood everywhere.”
I laid there in shock, with no words in my mouth. My heart ached
like it had never, like it had been pierced with a sword. I thought I
was going to die of shock because I still couldn’t believe uncle Sam
would do this to me. Uncle Sam who people liked and praised like he
was our father. He ruined me, I felt my life had fallen and
shattered like a broken glass.

To be continued…….

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 5!!!!

It’s Saturday. I love Saturdays. . . who doesn’t?
I had just woken up with a loud bang on my head like the sound
coming out of a pendulum hitting the walls of a bell. I didn’t have
the best night but I never had the worst. All through the night,
my mind was clouded with thoughts I couldn’t place. That seemingly
minute experience I had with Sola really spoilt my mood. My memory
was refreshed and it was as if I was digging my hands into my
brain to remember so many hurtful things that had taken place in
my life.
“Hey, how are you feeling now?” Amaka said handling me a hot cup
of coffee.
“I’m good girlfriend; just a little bit depressed.”
“Sorry ehn. Is there anything else you would like me to get you?”
This girl and her over-pampering abilities, chai! “Anyways Amaka, I
am fine o!” I replied her.
“Well, if you say so.” She said leaving for the bathroom.
I was surprised she let the matter slide without probing any
further. That is very unlike Amaka. I took a sip from the coffee;
Amaka does make good coffee, even if she no sabi any other thing
related to the kitchen.
I was really tired and wanted to sleep again
but Harrysong’s “Reggae Blues” blasting from somewhere in the room
diverted my attention; it was definitely coming from my phone.
That’s my favourite naija hit for now and now my ringtone, no time!
I could hear Amaka’s cocky voice humming to it. . . E sure me say
if that girl release a track, na only me go download am just for love
sake not to talk of an album.
“Where the hell is the phone sef?”
“Under the bed.” Amaka screamed from the bathroom.
“And who dropped it there?”
“And is that a question for me to answer?” Well then, you might
want to ask your humble self rolling over the bed like a possessed
being. . . An obvious indication that you are indeed fine.
“Na you sabi o! Aproko.”
“I don turn aproko now abi. No wahala na. Make I get out of this
bathroom.” She replied.
“Amaka, I no get your time this morning o, I no even sabi wetin
you dey wash since morning.”
I finally found the phone under the bed and guess who had been
calling since yesterday, leaving me tons of apologetic texts; it was
Sola!
“For God’s sake, do I need to vomit ‘I am not Angry’ into this guy’s
ears before he understands that I am not angry? Abi what? It’s
enough he had to make me feel terrible about myself and a lot of
sinking deep into the past being done, but seriously, Sola, gimme a
break!”
“Wow! Guess he really needs to hear the last part cos ain’t no Sola
here” Amaka said with her micro-mini towel wrapped around her
body.
“Walahi Amaka, I’d kill you this morning.” I said, pouting my face
into her face.
“And I’d gladly die for your sake. . . Gosh! for crying out loud, just
admit you pissed, it’s okay to be mad; it’s okay to confess you not
feeling fine. Sola or whatever him papa and mama name him is a cow
and I’m sure he’s somewhere pretending he’s sorry for what he did
yet he’s having fun while you are here reading those texts of his
that are not one inch close to apology. You are my person, and no
guy tries shit with my person.”
“You’ve been watching too much Grey’s Anatomy obviously. . .”
“Shey na wetin you go talk be that? Your good heart go kill you one
day. Whether you like it or not, at a point in life, you’ve just gat to
offend some people o and make enemies if need be so far it’s for
your good. Stop playing cool all the time. . . Get fired up! Address
the f**king attitude and give your anger an expression!
“Point well taken Prof. Amaka.” I said, goggling my eyelashes like
someone with a peg in her eye.
“. . . And you are welcome dull apprentice!” she ran off.
“You for wait na. I’d have shown you some dullness.”
“And you need to dress up girl, we are going out!” Amaka said,
shouting at the top of her voice from the room.
“And where the hell would I be following you to? Mtcheeew! I’d be
damned if I dress up!”
“You should be!” she said locking up the room door.
“Amaka, open this door now o!” I said with my fist banging the
door.
Stupid girl! She already heard my footsteps! Sometimes I wonder
what my life would have been without her. . . Less-stressful I guess!
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
“I’d like Champagne”
“And you ma?” the bartender asked facing Amaka
“I’d like a bottle of Smirnoff and some well prepared cowskin. . .
Emphasis on well-prepared o!” she said trying to scare the waiter.
Amaka is an ass! See the way she was ‘stronging’ her face like
someone who dey beg shit to come out of her yansh. As if she had
ate a bad ‘ponmo’ at the restaurant before! Kai! She can spoil
business.
“Why na, what I do? Why are you looking at me like that? I was
just being real, hello o!”
“I don hear you o!” I responded.
“Unlike you, ordering for a champagne when you should knack better
alcohol to wash away that thing wey dey bug your mind; they form
well-mannered girl for there!”
“Na you sabi. I actually thought you were going to Sola’s house to
go do something crazy.”
“Well, I will. Maybe not today. I’d deal with him tomorrow.”
The bartender brought our order and while I was just glancing
around, my eyes caught Sola and Jide with a plus one which should
either belong to one of them. They were sitting and chatting at a
corner. I never knew he was Jide then.
“Maybe you really don’t have to wait till tomorrow.” I murmured.
“What?”
“We have company over there.” I said, shooting my eyes in the
direction of Sola with Amaka’s eyes tailing the direction.
“Well then, are you ready to be a bitch?”
“After you Prof.!” I said feeling some deep guts down my throat.
We both laughed, stood up from our seats, abandoning our order
which was as good as not touched. With Amaka at the front, I
followed her. Dada no fit fight but e get person wey chop liver pass
am.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Hi!” Sola said with his heart definitely beating beyond normal.
His ‘hi’ was full of guilt; an ‘hi’ trying to contain a disease that may
soon turn an epidemic.
“Hello, I am Ayobami. Sola’s girlfriend and you guys are?”
“. . . his victims dumbass!” Amaka screamed.
Now seriously, Amaka is being really bitchy. Shoo! Wetin the
girlfriend do na and seriously, you’d know an insecure girlfriend when
you see one! “Yai, Ayam Sola’s girlfriend” I murmured annoyingly”
stupid girl.
“Errm abeg, my time is precious! Who among you is Sola? I take it
that you are the one.” Amaka said facing Sola. It was written all
over his face that he was uncomfortable and unstable. Guilt is a
bastard!
“Do you know that you are a fool and an irresponsible man and a
beast!”
Now the conjuncts are getting too much! An indication that Amaka
don dey take am personal.
“How could you molest someone who shared an open mind with you?
You molested my friend here and its highly unacceptable to me. The
fact that she won’t react doesn’t mean I won’t. Now you are here
treating yourself to a meal with a chick who thinks you are a great
and faithful guy.”
At this stage, the girlfriend opened her mouth speechlessly and Jide
likewise was just staring saying nothing. Sola on the other hand
definitely doesn’t have anything to say.
“You’ve got something to say to me or my girl?” Amaka asked.
“Oh! Nothing! You think you can go about sending stupid apologetic
messages and you think that’s all? This is a huge warning to you,
stay away from my friend, do I make myself clear?”
Sola went dumb!
“I guess that silence means yes!”
“Sola, what do you have to say. I really don’t understand. Are these
ladies saying the truth?”
Now, the girlfriend is getting emotional. An indication of high
disappointment maybe not for what he did to me but the
unfaithfulness. She grabbed her bag and cried out running off slowly
in her 3 inches heels.
“Ayo please wait!” Sola screamed!
Now the unexpected happened! Jide hit Sola on the jaw and he
landed on his ass. . . I thought they were supposed to be friends.
“I am disappointed in you!” Jide screamed.
“Ouch!” Amaka said definitely with a smile! Stupid girl. She was
having fun and we were creating a scene in someone’s business
arena and the bartender was walking towards our corner.
“Hi, I am Amaka Coker” stretching forth her hand to Jide.
“I’m sorry. I am Jide Jones”
“My kind of man! I love me some Jack Bauer” Amaka said winking
at me with Jide smiling back.
“What’s going on here please! You distracting our customers and
making a mess of our restaurant.” The bartender said.
“We are so sorry man! A stipend for your trouble.” Amaka said,
dipping some notes in the guy’s pocket while she walked away with
Jide at the front and I followed afterwards.
“Fuck you Sola!” I said bending down to him with his ass on the
ground.
“And these two just stole my show!” I murmured running after
Amaka and Jide.
And then, I fell in love with him just like that!

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 4!!!!

I remembered clearly the ‘first’ time I met Jide, it was through
Sola, a friend who has a crush on me. Yea! That’s if attraction is
the same thing as a crush but who cares for fairies and wishes?
I’m for real in Flavour’s voice. Dreams, crushes and wishes when it
comes to girl/boy matters are better left for the teens. I’m a
grown ass woman; yea right! God bless Black American films.
The first time and countless times I ever met Jide was not as
significant as the first day I met him. The first time a woman
meets a man is distinctively different from the first day she meets
him. I wish I can remember that distinctive moment without
remembering Sola.
Sola is a handsome young man, unreserved, very agile, ambitious, and
a volatile film person. He was a senior by two years in the
university, can’t remember how we met; guess it’s not that
distinctive but I know we became close at a point. He’s got good
profile for every dream man but I really just couldn’t date him. He’s
controlling, domineering and manipulative and I think he has less
control over the pendulum in-between his thighs. Sola could be funny
even though he makes dry jokes. He has a girlfriend but lies about
having one but I never hesitated to throw his lies into his face. He’s
a trying liar but he definitely lies to the wrong person. . . I’m a
female Carl Lightman but natural as Torres in Lie to me Series. . . I
watch too much films right? I know.
Sola and I were close until the day he crossed a huge line.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Seriously, how many times do we have to discuss this? Put your
attraction for me under check. All I want for you is to be a good
friend and if you don’t want to, the door is as good as wide but
kissing or shacking up with a man I’m not dating or seeing is a no-
no for me.” I stressed with my voice at the highest pitch.
Who says hookers don’t have standards? Maybe those by the road
sides.
“I like you, I’m attracted to you, I love you, I want to date you
but we really can’t make it public till I’m sure we are taking this
serious.” Sola said.
Lest I forget, Sola enjoys being treated like a baby and you know
the worst part, you have to be a strong woman like I am not to
fall for his deceptive bedroom voice. Guys do have bedroom voices too
you know and when a guy is using that on you, he’s either trying to
calm you down for real or trying to get that big bro into that tiny
hole. Very manipulative voice! From experience but that’s a red light
sweetheart. I deserve better than secrecy but really, do I have to
scream into this guy’s ears that I am not willing to go down that
road with him not to talk of dating on a low-key?
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
“So how have you been?”
Jide’s succulent voice brought my body and soul back to life. If
there is anything I love about him, it’s the way he picks his words
and the voice lighting up and turning up the air-condition of my body.
Jide definitely knows how to make a woman let her guards down.
“I’ve been great. And you?” I replied.
“Obviously doing awesome my dear.”
I saw his eyes flash through my cleavage. I remembered how he
kept his eyes glued on my boobs the day he told me he was into me.
He obviously still has a crush on those wonderful works of Jah. I
chuckled.
“What?” he asked. I guess he was wondering why I chuckled.
“What’s what?” I stressed back with my eyes graciously focused on
him.
“Seriously what?” he asked again.
“Really, you want to the what thing? Stop doing that!” I screamed
sexily.
Having a woman screamed sexily is one of the greatest enthusiasm
guys feel. The more he tried to hide it, the more his eyes
increasingly gave him away.
“Stop doing what?” Jide said but this time, more daring as he pouts
his face into mine.
“It’s been a while you know. . .” he said.
Jide kept his face into mine for like five minutes and who knows
how much he would have stayed till a petrol tanker flashed its red
lights and that crazy sound the horn always make.
“You might want to keep your eyes more on the road you know!” I
winked at him and he readjusted.
“Hmmmm, never mind me, you always intrigued me anytime. Those
eyes, those legs, that face, that brain, that woman! Seriously, it’s
just been six months I went away and it feels like I have never met
a woman before in my life even though you turned me down till I
left.”
“Exactly what I need you to stop! You flirting with me Jide, not
nice!” I said.
“And you enjoying every bit!” he replied.
Now I couldn’t hold my laughter. He caught me, I was really
enjoying it. I love it when a guy flirts with me especially when it
turns out to be someone I like! It’s not only me I guess. Most ladies
like it!
Wild thoughts began to run through my mind! Hmmmm, bad girl! The
worst thing that could ever happen in this SUV right now is to have
that awesome experience! Well, yeah! Amaka tells me about having a
sexual affair with a crush she never said yest to and how awesome
it always feels shacking up with some you are not exclusive with. . .
Many strings attached, less emotions involved! I want to try it some
day. I love to try new things you know!
“So where are you off to?” Jide asked, breaking the silence!
“Well. . . Why didn’t you call me to tell me you are around?” I fired
back.
“And why should I tell you? . . . ” he said trying to get something
out of me.
“Because I know you really do wanna tell me right now.”
Now, that’s me trying to psych him.
“And why would I want to do that?” he said.
“Hmmmmm” I sighed licking my lips.
“Six months, I was away for an advanced course and you never
thought it nice enough to call or reach out, even though we
weren’t a thing but I did try to make us a thing but for some
reasons I don’t know, you kept on turning me down. So, when I
came back, which I just did yesterday, I never really thought I
was one person you would be interested to see.” He said with so
emotions and I can feel it.
“Awwww. . . I’m sorry but really you could have tried and see what
my reaction would be but seriously, I do wanna see you!”
I couldn’t believe I just said that.
“Really?” he asked eagerly.
“Yea. . . but don’t blush.”
“I won’t. . . lol.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Leave me alone! You hurting me!”
I was screaming loud, hitting him and was sobbing but he never
gave a damn.
I remembered the day Sola molested me. He never slept with me but
he rumpled with my body. I remembered getting tired of hitting him
that I just laid there at a point and allowed him have his way till he
gets tired if he ever does!
We just finished sharing a nice meal of roasted plantain popularly
referred to as boli with groundnut and a bottle of coke and I
guessed he mixed his with an half bottle of ‘Osomo’. I got busy
surfing the net and Sola began getting cozy with his mouth to my
ears like a dog licking another dog’s ear wound. I told him to stop;
he did and later on continued and this time, he was like a beast. . .
like I’ve never seen him before.
He was voraciously eating my ears like a dessert; his hands on my
breasts; then his mouth. I couldn’t take it anymore! I screamed
silently sobbing. He stopped and went silent like an alcoholic trying to
be sober.
I stood up, fixed my hair with my hands and I took my bag to
leave.
“I’m really sorry. I’m not like this. I just really like you, you know
and I missed you!”
I was silent. It felt stupid hearing a guy I was never having an
affair with talking about missing me like as if we’ve been sleeping
with each other or touring each other’s bodies. Some guys are beasts
and it so sad have met more beasts than a cooing rabbit in a
lifetime.
“At least if you must leave, can you wait while I get you something
to comb your hair?”
I wasn’t angry, in fact, I couldn’t place what I was feeling;
whether annoyance, hate or anger. The truth is, a guy who can
harass or molest, can rape and hell be let loosed if someone ever
claims this guy can’t rape!
He went in with my bag as a security measure for me not leaving by
the time he returned. I took the brush, ran it through my weave,
he continued to apologize till I took my leave.
He called my phone endlessly, sending texts but who cares for an
apology over a cloth that has been rumpled after all there’s no light
to iron it. . . How I wished he had tried it with Amaka, he’d have
been in the ‘market’ by now. Mad girl!
All things being said, no grudges or unforgiveness harboured but that
was the last day I was going to speak to him.

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 3!!!!

It’s been a while I felt a sharp-thrusting in between my thighs like
I did yesterday night. I remember clearly the surprise and disdain
widely capitalized on Amaka’s face the day I told her I wanted to
stay off sex for a while but who would have thought I was going to
break my 6 months old celibacy with Papa Seun’s ‘divine sword’!
Papa Seun isn’t my type but seriously, how many ladies with a
voracious sex appetite like mine considers who or who is not a type
when on heat? Mtcheew! Most times, we end up having random sex
with people we never thought we could have it with. Well, not ‘we’,
maybe just me!
Sitting at the edge of the bed and ruminating over it all, I caught
Papa Seun stealing glances at me as if it were some agile man
winking at a sexy female bartender. I shook my head unbelievably at
what I just rode powerfully without an energy drink. Yorubas must
be definitely right about sex and foul spirits. . . There’s nothing
enticing about this man on my bed but I just screwed him or did he
screw me?
I hate to remember the ugly details of my ‘sexcapades’ but this one
just keeps clicking for no reason. The thought of
EIt’s been a while I felt a sharp-thrusting in between my thighs
like I did yesterday night. I remember clearly the surprise and
disdain widely capitalized on Amaka’s face the day I told her I
wanted to stay off sex for a while but who would have thought I
was going to break my 6 months old celibacy with Papa Seun’s
‘divine sword’!
Papa Seun isn’t my type but seriously, how many ladies with a
voracious sex appetite like mine considers who or who is not a type
when on heat? Mtcheew! Most times, we end up having random sex
with people we never thought we could have it with. Well, not ‘we’,
maybe just me!
Sitting at the edge of the bed and ruminating over it all, I caught
Papa Seun stealing glances at me as if it were some agile man
winking at a sexy female bartender. I shook my head unbelievably at
what I just rode powerfully without an energy drink. Yorubas must
be definitely right about sex and foul spirits. . . There’s nothing
enticing about this man on my bed but I just screwed him or did he
screw me?
I hate to remember the ugly details of my ‘sexcapades’ but this one
just keeps clicking for no reason. The thought of Eliza flashed
through my mind. Obviously, that girl must definitely have an eye
defect maybe color blindness. It wasn’t Amaka with Papa Seun but
do I even need to spell it out that it was me? I go iron that girl
mouth one day.
It’s 8.30am, I adjusted the curtains to peep through the
courtyard. It was as silent as a grave yard except for the small kids
running around in their nakedness. That’s my cue, Papa Seun can
now leave my room as everybody has gone about their daily jobs
including the likes of Mama Seun who never takes her bath and the
nosy Eliza who sees the wrong person.
“Papa Seun, come and start going o” I said silently.
Who dares struggle with a mad man, you never know if he has lost
his teeth or if they are still very much sharp.
“Shey time don reach to go ni? Abeg make we do one round join na”
“E be like say something dey worry you o! No be only one round, na
four”
“Nothing spoil na. I am ready for you. You sef know say I be man
na. I dey hear your moans of pleasure yesterday o!”
“Papa Seun, e don do o! I go call you when I come aus for evening.”
I supported him to the door with my hands pushing him forward.
Who go see free meal and no go wan pitch tent for there? I
actually just lied about seeing him in the evening. We definitely
won’t get to see.
I locked the door after him and I hit the showers. I removed my
clothes, staring at the mirror; I stared at myself. Who says
nakedness isn’t a good sight to behold. I firmly cupped my boobs
with my hands, I smiled at how perky they still remain even though
there were days when they were lot perkier than that.
The water sprinkled down my body, and it was so soothing and
sweet but as it runs over my face, the memories of the night
keeps flooding in. Papa Seun is indeed a man; little wonder why
Mama Seun can never let go or behave as if he’s not missing. No
woman ever likes to share her man’s goody sacs with another. And
that was the only good thing about Papa Seun. Everything physical
about the man was boring except that!
He’s 5ft tall, that’s how I managed to stay on top. He’s ugly but
educated, Primary Six School Leaving Certificate; lol at least that’s
what he said! The worst part is he’s got protruding tummy. How can
someone of that body size be nursing a tummy and a whole me just
devoured that piece of bread, ‘Konji’ must really be a bastard!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Ojota! Ojota! Ojota!”
Loud voices and bad breaths equals to some Agberos!
With my on point figure 8 firmly enclosed in a Denim trouser and a
long-sleeved crop top, my hair tied into buns and my legs rocking a
black sandal Amaka got me from Dubai, I waited by the road for
an Oshodi bus with a small travelling bag and an handbag in my hand.
The early morning sun was beginning to take a peep at me and I
was impatiently tired of waiting till an exotic car slowed down beside
me. It was Jide, my ex!

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT 2!!!!

And there I stood, it wasn’t a dream. It was me staring into
the bulging faces of Mama Seun and the beautiful ‘gbeboruns’ of
No. 5 pretentiously referred to as neighbours. Staring at each other,
we were both lost for words for few minutes. The meeting was so
awkward and it was first of its kind in the history of my co-
tenancy with Mama Seun.
“Omo ilu mi, ma binu jare, na only you dey house?” Finally some
words!
I made a prolonged silent hiss motivated by anger and frustration.
My anger towards Mama Seun for spoiling my morning and sabotaging
my sleep wasn’t a small one after all, it seemed like I wasn’t the
one she was looking for.
“Mama Seun, na only me dey house, wetin happen na?” I asked
with a stern in my voice and a grin at the likes of Eliza, Mama Titi
and Papa Chinyere; the clueless neighbours at my doorstep.
“I dey go work o Mama Seun, wetin happen na. Answer the babe
o.”
Mtcheeeew! Yeye neigbour, I felt like smacking his head. Old man
sha wan talk so tey him no sabi say na weekend we dey, abi person
dey go work for weekend? Maybe e dey work for mortuary, who
knows!
I let it stride without expanding the comment made by Papa
Chinyere so it won’t become a distraction for Mama Seun to jump
into.
Papa Chinyere is one of my best neighbours in the compound. Maybe
I like him because of his head sha. Bald-headed men trips me
especially those with pot-belly; it somehow makes it interesting you
know; and my one wish ever since I got my apartment at No. 5
was to get my hands on Papa Chinyere’s head whichever way even
if it has to be the best way I know how to. I must before I leave
the compound.
“Ma binu jare omo ilu mi.” Mama Seun’s response cut my imaginations
short and threw me back into the reality of the moment. The
woman can ‘famz’ for Africa.
The ‘omo ilu mi’ ish is what always makes me tired of her. We both
happened to share the same State and Town; the only thing we
never shared was our Local Government Areas. She is from the
South part, while I came from the North part and we just weren’t
really close but she never ceases to maximize any opportunity she has
with me to flaunt the fact that we came from the same state as
if it was some Dubai visa.
“I know say you go don vex since, no vex abeg. I no know say na
you dey house na.” Mama Seun continued
“So you no even know who dey house before you started shouting
and screaming our names to come help you join in your matter?”
Mama Titi added facing Mama Seun.
“Abi o Mama Titi. Me dey waka go my room o abi na wetin?” Papa
Chinyere turned to go.
“Come make we help them settle this matter na. Papa Chinyere!
Come back abi na wetin sef? Na only you waka come here? Shoo!. .
.”
“Ehn, Mama Titi, e don do abeg. No start another matter for my
doorstep. Only you and Eliza don do to settle why Mama Seun dey
bang my room early momo.” I lashed out facing each of them at a
pause in utterance.
“Sebi I don tell you say make you no vex na. Ma binu simi, we no
fit fight na.”
“I no vex o Mama Seun but who you con dey find?” I replied.
“Na Amaka”
‘Hehehehehehehe’. I laughed weirdly. Somehow, her response threw
me off balance. Where con be the boiling point of ‘a proper
madman’ and ‘an occasional madman’? Maybe at the point of insanity
sha.
“Amaka no dey o. My babe has travelled since yesterday and I don’t
think Amaka would be coming back anytime soon.” I gushed out.
“Itumo?”Mama Seunsked eagerly in Yoruba.
“Wetin happen sef Mama Seun? I screamed the words at her; I
was already running out of patience but I couldn’t help but pity. . .
A typical local Yoruba wife looking for her man!
“Well, Mama Seun, the itumo be say, Amaka ti travel, ‘mi o mo igba
to ma wa’ or better still, ‘ko wa mo’. I emphasized.
The only time I speak my mother tongue is when I’m being
frustrated or loosing my patience with someone; but really is that
the only time I should express myself in my mother tongue? But
who cares anyways, I hate when you have to repeat something all
over and over again. Only God knows where common sense has gone
to in this country with some people!
“Well, e be like say you go gimme her number o because I dey find
my husband.”
Now, I couldn’t contain my laughter anymore. Amaka and Baba
Seun? I really don’t seem to understand.
“But Mama Seun, shey you and Amaka don dey share your husband
ni because I don’t understand what Amaka or Amaka’s number has
to do with your husband?”
“Me I sabi wetin I dey talk o plus God save her say I no meet her
for house and help me tell her say if she like herself, make she no
come back to this compound again o!”
Now, I was really beginning to laugh real hard. Mama Seun na
‘were’ (madwoman) but her madness no reach Amaka own. We both
know she’s just bluffing. Somehow I seemed lost in her conversation,
and the next minute, I was really feeling like I was in control of
the whole situation.
“Abeg, shey your husband dey miss ni abi wetin. Fill me in na, Mama
Seun, na me o, your omo ilu?” . . . I was beginning to enjoy the
whole scenario now.
“Wo, leave me jare. The last time I saw my husband was yesterday
morning before I go drop Seun for school and when I came back
late in the evening from my outings, I couldn’t find my husband. I
asked everyone, checked everywhere till Eliza told me that the last
time she saw my husband was with Amaka. E for even better at
least; na the way she saw them gave me concern.”
Choi! Eliza the ‘loose’ girl. When I said she is loose, that’s what I
meant. Loosed-mouth everywhere. She is the type you have to be
secretive with or else, ‘your own don done for Africa.’
“How she con talk say she see them o, Mama Seun?” I asked
“Sebi Eliza sef dey here na, oya talk na.” Mama Titi interfered
facing Eliza with seriousness written all over her face.
“Erm! Erm! Erm!. . .”
Hehehehehehehehe, that was Eliza stammering. Mama Titi and Mama
Seun were wondering about the reason for her sudden slow in
speech and were pressuring her to talk but ‘sebi na only sane person
go sabi why insane man dey chop savage on top refuse dump.’
Indirectly, I sabi wetin dey make Eliza stammer. Eliza no wan chop
another dose of me, but whether convenient or no, Eliza just have
to talk o. Mama Seun won’t allow her not to and I won’t allow her
to miss my dose either!
“Erm, Erm, I saw Aunty Amaka putting a measurement tape
around Baba Seun’s thing.!”
“Ah! Lobatan o!” Mama Titi screamed
“Which one con be thing na, you better talk well well.” Mama Seun
screamed.
“Erm, I mean say, Aunty Amaka was measuring Baba Seun’s thing.”
Eliza said, making gestural descriptions.
“Was she holding it or how she dey take measure am?”
“Errrm! E don do o Mama Titi!” I lashed out. The woman too like
male anatomy but people don’t see it because Mama Titi gets to hide
it well under her ‘spirikoko’ attitude but as Amaka dey take talk
am, “Na one robber fit identify the other.” I couldn’t help but laugh
at the whole scenario. Baba Seun isn’t Amaka’s type. Maybe
whatever they were doing was misunderstood by Eliza and that one
sef go hear am from me.
“Well, Mama Seun, I would try and reach Amaka for you because
her number is presently not available and whatever that was Eliza
saw, I’m sure she misunderstood it.”
“Okay o! Sha warn the stupid girl for me, make e no go,chop poison
one day.”
Mama Seun hissed and left. Wow! I just had a comic morning of my
life. I just lied to Mama Seun about Amaka’s number not reachable
but seriously what would Mama Seun have said to Amaka if I had
given the number to her? Well, na Mama Seun sabi o!
I entered my room to an annoying sound like a grunting of the pig!
Yeah right! That was a man snoring on my bed; yet he has no
potbelly and less fat, except for the thing in-between his legs. Been
there, done well! Lol!
“Bebe, come to bed now!”
“Thought you still sleeping?”
What kind of man snores and yet he is awake? I murmured to
myself.
“Been awake since jare! What was that about?”
“Your wife is such a raging bitch you know. . .”

THE LIFE OF THE REPENTANT SLUT!!!

Come out now o! I no dey follow u play o!
which kain nonsense be dis na?” “O o ni jade abi (you won’t come out now abi), ashawo,
you don overchop dis time o! ‘Amuofia come
out na o, ehn ehn!” Mama Seun was shouting
at the top of her voice and banging the door
at the same time. . . Sometimes, I wonder
what type of microphone is rooted in the
woman’s oesophagus. It was just 5.00a.m. in
the morning; God knows that my sleep had
been murdered; chai! Abi which kain gobe be this one on Saturday morning?

I wasn’t lost in my thought that much
when the iron hand and microphone-pitched
voice of Mama Seun threw me back into
reality. “Were, so o ni bo o de ni?
(madwoman, won’t you come out) ‘Onyiara’,
‘Onyiochi’ . . . Papa Sola o! Mama Titi, Ada,
Eliza! Make una come out o. . .” she
continued to rant. Walking hastily to my
door, I was full of laughter to the brim, this
woman will not finish me for this compound.
“Wetin eyes never see sef. . .? that’s my mind calming me; but wait o, “this smells bad, this one wey Mama Seun don dey alert everyone wey dey No. 5. . .” my other mind was warning me. . . but seriously who cares? I haven’t done anything to be worried for. Mama Seun’s heavy fist landed on my door
again; I held the door knob, trying to open
the door but God knows that my mind was
long gone, one minute I am feigning ‘wetin
she go do’, the other minute, I’m f**king
scared and I don’t know which of the feelings is real but something tells me that na the fear real pass. “Shey if I no open the door, she go kill me? she go just frustrate commot na ni” I murmured to myself.

Mama Seun is not one to be toyed with and ever since I became a tenant at No. 5, I have made it a point of duty to always stay in my own lane. I chuckled; “what’s so funny babe?” I said to myself. Nothing much really; (na me dey ask, na me dey answer). Anyways, I just remembered one of my real goons, a brother soon to blow in the music industry wey be
say na only shikini time remain, his name is
Bragadosa. That’s not his real name though,
that’s one of his songs title, but that’s what I
call him. He always says “na my lane I dey
o”; very funny, but that slogan had kept my
relationship with Mama Seun at a sane level.

Where should I even start from?
Mama Seun’s body structure can make Aki
and Pawpaw piss for body if dem try
nonsense. She’s black not dark, heavily built,
6.3ft tall with a broad chest that always make
me wonder each time I see her, if she be gym
instructor in her past life. She’s big from her
chest side to the waist line, then from her
waist, she con slim no be small. . . I can’t
remember what body figure Amaka gave her
body but I know say the figure number no
dey this world. . . The worst part is she has
small tits, like the size of fruit; the biggest
size a fruit tree seed can ever be. Why do
they even call that thing fruit sef? I chop that
thing tire when I small, even till
undergraduate days. After I don chop am
finish, I go carry heavy stone to break it and
eat the groundnut inside it.
Hmmm (I sighed), Mama Seun’s tits can be
small but she unbelievably fed four kids with
that small thing. Choi! I don miss Amaka o,
that girl na proper ‘were’, she can lampoon
Mama Seun’s tits like crazy. She go talk say,
“wetin Papa Seun dey hold sef?” and na true
talk; the man hand big no be small, one hand
is as wide as a plantain leaf. It can couple me
and Amaka’s boobs together and the hand go
still get space and no be fruit tits o! Proper B
and C cups. . .
Hmmm, I lifted up my eyes and caught the
clock, it was already 5.30a.m., Mama Seun
still dey shout for there; na she sabi, na when
I wan open my door, I go open am. Walking
back briskly into the room, Mama Seun’s
voice began to intensify, she wasn’t the only
one screaming this time, I could hear
murmurings from neighbours. One voice that
was distinct enough was Eliza’s. That girl can
‘gbeborun’ for Africa; I’m so sure she would
be the first person to come out on Mama
Seun’s call.
Eliza and Mama Seun na 5 and 6; always
together tending to their daily businesses,
and guess what that is, gossiping of course.
Me and Mama Seun would have been the
closest neighbour at No. 5 but me being me, I
don’t mix with ‘hybrids’, I do pure
‘werewolves’ or pure ‘vampires’ only; too
much vampire diaries and supernaturals.
Elizabeth turned Eliza, thanks to people like
Mama Seun. Elizabeth is too ‘tush’ to
pronounce, but Eliza is more Nigerian for
her. I almost beat that babe one day, but na
‘tori’ for another day. Eliza already grew to
like the way she’s being called. Wetin the
yeye girl sabi before; ‘all eyes on me’ and
‘olasanmi’ no be the same thing?
Eliza is a Senior Secondary School 3
student, she is Igbo, born only but bred in
our area, she is popularly referred to as
‘Mama Seun’s Igbo Teacher’. Yea right; she is
the one who teaches Mama Seun all her
sickened Igbo insults she’s been vomiting
since morning except that she is a good
teacher and Mama Seun na terrible and poor
student. Eliza is a black beauty, she’s sharp,
intelligent, 5.7ft tall, slim but proportionally
‘hipful’ with a rounded perky breast which
she flaunts about in transparent clothes
without a girdle to hold them. She always
reminds me of my young self back in the
days. Her only defect is that she’s highly
‘loose.’
Lifting up my head from where I was
seated, the clock sounded and then it dawned
on me that it was 7.00a.m. already. I
definitely have places to go to today and
Mama Seun that I know would never retreat
until I surrender. I decided to brace up to the
fate at my doorstep, I walked smartly to the
door in my hot night-wear, my hands on the
door knob with an attempt to unlock it and
there it was, I just did.

To be continued....

FORBIDDEN LOVE 6

Continuation…..

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday
Meso…..,” I opened my eyes to my family singing right beside my
bed. I couldn’t believe days had gone by and it was my birthday all
of a sudden. I covered my face with my palms trying to hide my
tears of joy. My parents had always celebrated my birthday but
never had they seem so excited to surround my bed early in the
morning to sing happy birthday to me with a cake. It was so weird
to see them sing for me like this. Normally they would just wish me
a happy birthday, pray for me and tell me they would fry chicken
for me. I mean, they used to celebrate my birthday at times but It
wasn’t regular, especially in this manner. I removed my face and
looked up as uncle Sam slowly walked into the room.

My smile became wider and I giggled with joy in my heart.
“It was uncle Sam that got the cake for you and told us to come
and sing for you!”Esther said and jumped up with excitement when
she saw him.
I guess she shouldn’t have snitched that way because I suddenly
became a little sad. Although, I still smiled on the outside to show
my appreciation I wasn’t really happy. Probably because I already
thought my parents must have been so excited for me to decide to
buy a cake and come sing beside my bed. I pushed that to the back
of my mind and focused on what was going on at the moment. “Blow
out your candles! Blow out your candles!” Esther yelled. I smiled at
her and blew out the twelve candles that stood on the cake as they
clapped and prayed for me. I thanked everyone and they all left the
room except uncle Sam. He smiled at me and sat on the bed beside
me. He stared at me for a moment and finally asked if I liked my
cake. I said yes and thanked him for buying it for me.
“Anything for my love,” he said.
I just smiled at him and he hugged me. His arms were around me for
a while which seemed weird until we heard Esther yelling out my
name before he suddenly stood up and said he would talk to me later.

I stood up, went in to take a shower and later went to spend the
rest of the day with my family. Senior Daniel even texted me and
wished me happy birthday he said he even had a gift for me and
would give me when we resume school. I also got calls from some of
my friends wishing me, happy birthday. I was so happy all through
the day and didn’t let anything ruin it for me.
A week later……
“Uncle Sam, please leave me alone. I don’t want to do that with
you.”
“Just once and that’s it. Meso please do it for me. Don’t you love
your uncle? Just once” Uncle Sam held me as he was begging me.
I was crying and telling him I didn’t want to do it with him before
I woke up to sweat running down my forehead and tears running
down my eyes. I just had a very confusing, weird but scary dream.
Why was I crying in my dream? Why was uncle Sam begging me? I
asked myself. I sat up when I realized Esther was beside me. She
said she had been waking me up but I just kept saying,”No! No! No!”
I just told myself it was a dream and let it go.

It was the first day of school after our Christmas break and I couldn’t wait to see
my friends and school father. While I was moisturizing my body,
Frank suddenly walked in. I immediately grabbed the towel that was
beside me and covered my nakedness. I couldn’t believe that just
happened. Why does my day have to start this way?
“Ah! Sorry oo, I tink say you dey for bathroom. I dey look for
Esther.” he said when he saw me naked.
I felt like using the bottle of cream in my hand to throw at his
mouth. He just had to walk in at that moment. I grumbled in
annoyance and quickly dressed up before he would come in again and
say it was a mistake. I hissed when I was done dressing up and
went to have my breakfast before leaving for school. Frank already
took Esther to school since he was the one who usually takes her
while I went to meet my friend who lived two blocks away from my
house, so we could go to school together.
After school, my school father sent for me so I went to see him in
his class. When I got there, all his friends that were with him
started hailing him and smiling at us.
All his friends were hailing him…
I couldn’t understand why.
He just smiled at them and said, “You guys now, Na my school
daughter oo.”
I just stood there in confusion until he asked me to hug him. I
found it really strange and it became really awkward between us
because I had never hugged him before and I never even hugged
my own class boys. I didn’t want to cause more awkwardness so I
just hugged him. All his friends were just raising their brows and
winking at him. They sure looked funny. He later reached for his bag
and brought out something in a gift wrap.

“Happy birthday!” he said as he handed the gift to me.
Smiling, I thanked him and then he said I could go and insisted that
we talk on the phone later. As usual, I went to meet my friend
who had been waiting for me so we could go home together. Later
that night, I spoke with senior Daniel on the phone and he
apologized for the behavior of his friends. I told him it was okay
and I found it rather funny than upsetting and he sighed in relief
before saying goodnight. In a week’s time, I was going to the hostel
as a border. My mum had broken the news to me the night before
we resumed school. She said one of her friends told her that the
boarding house was very good for training students and so she told
my dad about it and they both decided I become a boarder. I was a
bit excited and sad. I was definitely going to miss home but I was
excited to experience the life as a boarder. All my friends who were
boarders already talked on how they found the boarding house both
tough and interesting. There was always something to talk about
whenever you were with a boarder. I couldn’t wait to join them
and experience it myself.

To be continued……

BECOMING A BETTER PERSON EVERYDAY!!!

OMG.When I think about the mistakes I’ve made, the unkind words I’ve spoken, the
opportunities I’ve let slip by, the unhealthy
mindsets I’ve fostered — it makes me want to hang my head in shame. On too many occasions, I have not acted as my best self, the self I want to be. The self I know
I’m capable of being. On too many occasions, I have accepted mediocre, I’ve stood by when I should have acted, I’ve said “no” to life when I could have said “yes.”
If there is any grace in this humbling
admission, it’s the knowledge that I’m not
alone. Failing to live up to expectations, our
own or that of others, is part of the human
condition. We are flawed, every single one of us. And as hard as we may try to be our “best selves,” we will never reach that goal. We will never reach it because our best self is a work in progress. It will be until the day we die. But . . . we can be a “better self.” We can define the best self we want to be and strive daily to come as close to that as possible. Yes, we will forget. We will falter. We will fail at times. However, as long as we keep trying to be better, we are doing our best. I believe without our mistakes and failures, we can’t come close to becoming our best selves . Without them, we don’t know where and how to improve. We may be inspired to set lofty goals, but it’s the mistakes along the way that show us the next step we need to take.

Failure may be humbling, but it is a teacher. If you shift your perspective just a bit, maybe you’ll even see your lapses as a gift. I love what thought leader and author Marianne Williamson says about failure and being a better person: The new midlife is where you realize that even your failures make you more beautiful and are turned spiritually into success if you became a
better person because of them. You became a more humble person. You became a more merciful and compassionate person.
That has certainly been true for me. In my
young adult years, I did everything possible to hide my failures and flaws. I had a hard time facing my negative qualities and admitting, “Yep, you belong to me.” With every passing year, you gain acceptance that perfection is an impossible goal and a waste of time. You learn to forgive yourself and can more easily move on. You learn to extract the valuable nuggets from your blunders before you run away from
them with your head down and eyes averted.

You learn that being a better person means
embracing your strengths and weaknesses.
I want to be a better person, and I believe you do as well. Let’s work together to accept the inevitability of mistakes, flaws, and setbacks, while continuing to move toward the best self we all desire to be.

Here are some thoughts on how to
be a better person every day:

- Define your best self.

Set the benchmarks for self-improvement by specifically defining what they are. What does your ideal self look like in all areas of your life? I like to begin this process by writing down the various roles of my life. For example:
Partner
Friend
Coach
Entrepreneur
Writer
Teacher

Then I define my best self using this sentence:
“I want to be the best  (partner, friend,
etc.) I can be by . . . .” Then I fill in the blank
until I run out of ideas or goals. Like this:
I want to be the best parent I can be by . . .
Allowing my young adult children to be
themselves, even if they make choices I
wouldn’t. Showing interest in their interests. Being available when they need my support or input. You get the picture here. Define the specific actions you think contribute to being your best self in all of your life roles. But don’t stop with your roles. Go further to include your values,
interests, goals, and dreams. These might
include:
Health
Fitness
Travel
Home
Hobbies
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Personal Habits
Thought Habits

Create your own list, and follow the steps
outlined above. Use the sentence, “I want to
be my best self in my health (fitness, travel,
home, etc.) . . .,” and then write down specific actions or changes you aspire to make.

Prioritize your list.

You may end up with a list of dozens of
changes or actions you’d like to implement.
Don’t let this overwhelm you — remember,
becoming a better person is a constant work in progress. I like to begin where I’m feeling the most discord between the current situation and where I’d like to be. This is often a situation where I’m acting against my integrity or values.
When you behave against your integrity and values, you experience emotions of guilt, shame, self-loathing, anxiety, and even depression. You aren’t being true to yourself, so your psyche is rebelling. You also may notice problems in your work or relationships. It’s hard to improve other areas of your life until you address these. If you aren’t clear on your core values, here’s a good list of values to help you.
Another great place to begin is with your close relationships. Our relationships are critical to our happiness, and I know all of us have ways we can improve our marriages, partnerships, parenting, friendships, and work connections.

By learning skills of emotional intelligence
and healthy communication, we can make
huge strides in becoming better people.
Often we want to be better by developing
better habits. Maybe we want to exercise, eat more vegetables, or learn to meditate
regularly. Developing good habits is hard.
Dropping bad habits is even harder. One of
the most valuable skill sets you can learn to
assist you in becoming a better person is the skill set of developing habits. Without these skills, it’s nearly impossible to stick to your habit goals. Sometimes you can develop one keystone habit, like exercise for example, that will trigger a whole cascade of other positive habits. You can learn more about the skills of
habit creation here. Practice small change daily.

No matter how you decide to begin, don’t feel you have to perform an “extreme life
makeover” in one afternoon. Simply by
defining your best self and the actions you
need to take, you’ve created awareness and
motivation. If you take just one small action a day to align with your “best self” definition, you’ll accumulate a lot of change over a year’s time.
Start with small actions that take very little
time, maybe five minutes or less. Make it so
easy, you have no excuse to avoid taking
following through. Slowly increase your time or the difficulty of your actions week by week. If you miss a day, don’t shame yourself. Just start again the next day.
As you practice positive actions for self-
improvement, begin to see the process as
rewarding and satisfying as the result. Don’t wait until you see yourself as the best you can be to feel proud and accomplished. Enjoy the journey and every step along the way.

Expect setbacks.

As I mentioned before, you will have setbacks. Examine your mistakes and failures to learn from them. This alone is an act of bettering yourself. Then take what you’ve learned and try again. Don’t allow yourself to fall in a hole of apathy, despair, or cynicism. Don’t talk yourself into the lie that you don’t have what it takes. Don’t decide that past failure prevents you from future success. The only thing that prevents you from becoming a better person is making the choice to give up and do nothing. Even if you have a day when you’re down or don’t feel well, you can still take some small, manageable action to
better yourself. Say a kind word. Learn
something new. Apologize to someone. There’s always something we can do.
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and weaknesses.

- Find inspiration.

Life sometimes seems to conspire against our desire to become better people. There are so many negative influences and temptations to throw us off track or confuse our goals. Make a point of finding people who inspire and motivate you. Surround yourself with positive, happy friends and family. Read uplifting material, and listen to happy, joyful music. Continue to read articles, books, and blogs about personal evolution, self- awareness , and emotional intelligence. If there are people or environments in your life that pull you away from your goals of self- improvement, you’ll need to pull yourself away from them. Don’t allow them to undermine your hard work and daily efforts to improve. You can inspire yourself by reviewing all of
the positive changes you’ve made in the past to become a better person. Acknowledge your successes, and congratulate yourself on your willingness to grow. Affirm to yourself daily, “Every day, in every way, I am becoming better and better.”

See you at the top!!!

10 Stages Of A Relationship From Hello to Goodbye

Most love relationships begin, develop, and
even unravel without our being fully aware of what’s going on. Especially at the beginning. We meet someone, feel an initial attraction, and then if everything lines up as it should, we are swept away in a torrent of chemically- driven emotions that blind us to anything but the intense joy and passion we’re experiencing. Oh, if we could only bottle up that period of time and sprinkle those feelings over us a few years down the road. As you’ve probably experienced, those intense feelings of infatuation and early love fall away over time and transform into something else.
Sometimes that something else is a deeper,
more satisfying, emotionally intimate
connection. Other times, not so much.
Understanding the stages your relationship
passes through as it develops, and even if it isending, can help you navigate these various chages with mindfulness and self-awareness.

Here are the 10 stages of a relationship in

1. Initiation

This is the very beginning stage when you first meet someone. This stage is all about
impressions and appearance. You are
attracted to how this person looks, dresses,
and presents themselves, and they are judging and evaluating you with these same criteria. You both are paying attention to the subtle and not-so-subtle signals you are sending about yourself and your attraction to one another. Although these early impressions may or may not be accurate, they influence whether or not the two of you want to progress to the next stage.
If you are in this stage . . .
As much as you want to put your best foot
forward, try to be yourself. You want someone to be attracted to your authenticity and true personality. Even if you find yourself physically attracted to this new person, pay attention to their body language, social skills, and any qualities you know you want in a partner. It’s easy to overlook red flags when you have a strong attraction to someone.

2. Experimentation

In this stage of the relationship, both of you
begin to dig a bit deeper to see what common interests and values you might have. You learn more about the person behind the attractive face and whether or not this is the type of person you want in your life. This can be a really fun and exciting time as you discover more about one another and how you relate. Or it can be disappointing when you realize this person isn’t the right match or isn’t what you thought he or she might be.
If you are in this stage . . .
This is the best time to ask important
questions, without scaring this new person
away. You’ll want to get an idea about his or
her values related to what’s important to you, as well as learn about areas of compatibility and commonalities in your world view. You don’t want to ask off-putting questions like,
“Do you see children in your future?” or “How much money do you make?” But you want to ask about their life goals, their family and friends, and how they spend free time. You can learn a lot about someone with just these questions.

3. Intensifying

Now the relationship is getting more serious and intense. You’ve found enough in common zthat you begin sharing more private and intimate information. You are both checking the other to see if you share deeper feelings, zand you’re looking for signal  that this person wants to move forward. This is the time when you might express your feelings of affection,
start spending more time together, and give
one another gifts.
If you are in this stage . . .
It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement of this new relationship. But this is an important time to make sure you are both on the same page before you become more intimate or involved. Sometimes one partner is more ready to move forward in closeness and commitment before the other, which can result in the relationship ending prematurely or becoming imbalanced. If possible, try to pace yourself and use your good judgment even if you are completely infatuated.

4. Integration

Now the relationship is in full bloom, and you are a couple. You spend increasing amounts of time together and begin integrating aspects of your life. You become sexually intimate, and become more willing to be vulnerable and open about various aspects of your life. This is the point when you are truly in love and feel free to express this with one another.
If you are in this stage . . . Enjoy it! At this point in the relationship, you both feel secure and happy, and you are able to share more and more of your life with this
person. As you become more involved in one another’s lives, you may begin to see areas of possible disagreement or discord. Use the powerful connection and love you have in these early days to address any possible issues before they undermine your closeness.

5. Bonding

Now the two of you are fully integrated, and you develop a more formalized commitment through marriage or living together. Your friends and family view you as a committed couple. You may pool your financial resources, make joint decisions as a couple (rather than as individuals), and begin having children.
If you are in this stage . . .
Congratulations on reaching this important
stage in your life. Fully committing to another person is a big step, and it means you have both navigated small and large hurdles in your developing relationship to reach this point. Having a bonded, loving, intimate relationship is not only deeply satisfying, but adds to your health and longevity. Now your mission is to maintain your close connection and protect it from the inevitable challenges couples face in their lives together. Be sure you are both committed to putting your relationship first, and that you have a plan in place to nurture your relationship and manage conflict in healthy ways. Coming Apart

6. Differentiating

As time goes on and the years go by, the two
of you begin to see one another more as
individuals than as a couple. This happens as the demands and pressures of life pull you in different directions and create stress and resentments. The bubble of romance and infatuation has burst, or is not longer
impenetrable, and conflicts become more
regular. If you are in this stage . . .
It’s very difficult to escape this stage,
especially if you’re a busy couple with
children and career demands. Differing needs and pressures compel you to take out your stresses on one another and protect your turf. It’s imperative for the health of your relationship that you take action to heal the rifts and address the triggers for conflict. This is a great time to find a licensed relationship counselor to help you get back on track and save your relationship.

7. Circumscribing

At this stage, you begin to pull apart even
more. You set protective boundaries for
yourself, communication devolves and
becomes less and less intimate. You may have your own lives, separate friends and activities, and separate spaces in your home. Arguments push you further apart, and you may avoid arguments because they are so painful, even though the problem or issue stills exists between you.
If you are in this stage . . .
This is a very painful and lonely time in a
relationship. The couple has pulled so far
apart they have lost their original intimate
connection and respect for one another. If you want to save your relationship, it is essential you work together with a counselor to heal the damage and define a new way of relating and reconnecting. You both will need to move past defensiveness, blaming, and resentments in order to build a stronger connection. If one of you is unwilling, there isn’t much hope for
saving the relationship.

8. Stagnation

When your relationship has stagnated, you’ve reached the point where separation is virtually complete. However, the relationship persists, for reasons of convenience or necessity. You may feel apathetic and disengaged, but at this
point you don’t see a compelling reason to end the relationship. At this stage, couples may stay together because they have children, even though their
relationship has tanked. If tension and conflict continue, it’s hard to discern whether separation is best or worst for the children. If you are in this stage . . .
It’s time to get counseling for yourself. You
need help in navigating this very painful time and deciding the best course of action. You may have financial issues to figure out, as well as coping with the emotional pain of ending this bond. Even if the relationship has hit rock bottom, the two of you are still intertwined in many ways.

9. Avoidance

Whether you’re living under the same roof or one of you has moved out, now you are truly separated . You spent little, if no time together, and when you are together, there is little eye contact or real communication. You are taking the first steps toward a permanent end to the relationship.
If you are in this stage . . .
The relationship has ended in all but the most formal ways. At this point, avoidance is a necessary coping mechanism and facilitates the end of the bond between you. You may find yourself confused and conflicted, and you may attempt to reconnect to avoid the pain of the separation. Again, having the support of a counselor, as wells as a support system of family and friends, can help you have clarity and strength during this time.

10. Termination

The relationship permanently ends through
divorce or the two people moving to separate homes. This can be a difficult time if there is conflict over money, children, and housing arrangements. For some couples, it is a time of relief and thinking ahead to a new future. If you are in this stage . . . You will likely need the help of an attorney and/or mediator to deal with the practical aspects of dividing assets and co-parenting your children. If you do have children, you will have several years in which you must navigate parenting decisions, child support, and custody. Having these decisions formalized through the court system will help you cope with potential conflict and further pain. It’s important that you prioritize your children’s health and well- being and that you minimize their exposure to
negativity and conflict between you and your former partner.

You may begin thinking about a new
relationship at this point. Or you may still fee ltoo much pain and confusion to consider entering a new relationship. Both of these feelings are normal. Use this time to examine what you learned through your previous relationship, and how you can apply those lessons as you move on in your life. Understanding these relationship stages will empower you to take action to protect, repair, or if necessary detach from your current relationship. Think about where you are now with your partner or love interest, and use this information to thoughtfully consider your next steps.

See you at the top!!!!